Thursday, July 27, 2006

EGO Disturbed...

Yes.. my ego's bruised today... I m fuming mad..

I dunno wassup with me .. but heard some comments today which I would hate to repeat.. but for the sake of this blog.. yes I will..

Had a meeting with the rest of the "dept" today.. with my boss ard.. so he kinda casually mentioned we can tell him anything.. and all that bull... think he was trying to "use" my example in a bid to sooth the tense atmosphere. He said... "like Amber lah .. got pple tell me she is not a good RSM... " RSM= MY JOB TITLE

My brain wanted to burst with a mix of anger, anger and anger... I can't be sure why too .. I kinda knew this already..

Well, like everyone knows.. I went back to a bank which I chose to leave earlier on.. I KNEW I wasn't too good at it .. no interest.. dun like the peeps there.. bla bla bla .. so I guess I had to face this sooner or later.. there are bound to be pple who will say this about me.. sighs..

So I was yakking about it to Rin n Pei.. n some guys ... dun really know who they are lah .. too cheesed off to talk about these pple anyway ...


I sent a few msgs out .. to my 2 bosses... (yes, including the one who said this in front of everyone).. and my immediate colleague.. I HAD TO WHINE. SO JUST LET ME BE.
My boss replied with.."Ok lah.. you will do good. You are doing a good job for me now, and to me, tat's all it matters."
Standard reply.. but I guess this kinda affirmation is what I needed... I dun really give a shit whether its true to his heart or not .


Ok...I have to admit.. I have never worked hard at any job since the day I joined this dark world of working life. So I will have to zip my mouth and swallow my pride when such comments about me not being good at my job is being made. BUT I KNOW I M GOOD!!! So now.. I will really have to prove something. I hope I m up to it... I m pretty sure I can.. usually I will just convince myself conveniently that aiya.. these pple I dunno them well too.. so who cares... and I dun bother to change myself.. nothing is changed. But now, at this ripe age of reaching 26.. this kinda of mentality's gotta go I guess. If I dun prove myself now.. when will I ever be able to?


IF I M THE ONLY PERSON WHO THINKS THAT I M CAPABLE, ITS POINTLESS.


"SELF PRAISE IS NO PRAISE."


So to everyone out there... if you know you have what it takes, go for it. No one will ever know.. if we don't FLAUNT it.

HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHHAHAHH

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

i remember talking abt this to fangyi before, that im afraid that im just a mediocre lawyer, and somewhere along the way i was afraid of losing my job as well. somehow that has all vanished, i think because of a unique situation in my office now.

i think im a huge slacker as well, and ive been indirectly criticised like that before as well. i dont think its constructive criticism because the person does not show u ways to improve. so just ignore it.

Ditzy Doll said...

I m fine ... I get over things pretty fast ... Just needed to get it out of my system.. once tat's done.. i m pretty much done too! haha

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